I’m grateful for my kids. For their laughter. Their sense of humor and being wise way beyond their age. I am grateful for the time we are together. I am grateful for being here. Home. It’s familiar and comfortable. I am grateful that I heard my mother’s voice today. I am grateful for understanding what forgiveness is and what letting go really means. I am grateful for second chances and making the most of it. I am grateful for the whiny roads in beautiful Orinda. I’m grateful for Canyon that leads to Sneak Road. And Camino Pablo. I’m grateful for all the familiar places that bring comfort during chaos. These places are mine. My memories. All mine…No intruders….just mine….and that feels really really good.
Today my 80 year old mother and my 88 year old father stopped by so that I could download the Whole Foods app on my mother’s cell phone. They didn’t come inside and kept their masks on as we sat in the back yard – It killed me not to be able to hug or kiss them. To have survived the Iranian Revolution only to be separated so abruptly by a virus…It’s unnerving and it kills me to think that our lives will never be the same – That I can’t get close enough to them to hug them, to smell them and to feel their skin. They brought me into the this world and despite all of our dysfunction, I love them with everything I have. I respect them for the hardship they have endured and for doing their best to start a new life with nothing.
Photos dating back to 1969 to the day I was born me, my mom, dad and brother. Me, my mom, grandmother and aunts in black and white photo – Tehran and Caspian Sea.
It’s been an emotional day with my entire life flashing before me – I feel scattered but at the same time have clarity.
Will write more later….it’s been a long day.